L allowed his hand and arm to hang limply as his hand was held by Light.
Light's words brought him back, addressed the consciousness L had left in such a state. And L did think, and consider, and realized he was tired of it. L had died, Watari had died, and his thinking had failed to save him from even that. If this was L rebelling against what he had been in a previous life, then so be it. It was a childish way to look at the situation, L knew, but L was tired and drugged and he didn't mind using such as an excuse. Maybe he could make Light scream, use this experience as another means to blackmail Light.
But, truthfully, that's not what he wanted from this experience. He wanted someone he could trust, someone he could fall asleep on without having to spend the energy to hate. With Watari gone, L was looking for that person in places he never would normally, reaching out to find respite in one of the criminals he had sworn to catch. L's sense of professionalism had crumbled the moment Watari left his side, and he felt empty without his work. He had no purpose here in Death City. The closest thing to his old life he had was Kira, was Light, and to Kira, to Light, he clung.
There was no doubt in L's mind about this. It was impossible for them to return to the way things were, L knew that, so why not shift the dynamic between them through their intentions instead of just circumstance's? L had the chance to turn away long before this, even before he ate his piece of cake.
L's lips moved to press against Light's softly, then firmly, to seal the deal with a kiss. And with the seal, those lips brought Light's answer, even before L parted in order to speak it out loud. "I know."
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2011-01-31 09:39 am (UTC)Light's words brought him back, addressed the consciousness L had left in such a state. And L did think, and consider, and realized he was tired of it. L had died, Watari had died, and his thinking had failed to save him from even that. If this was L rebelling against what he had been in a previous life, then so be it. It was a childish way to look at the situation, L knew, but L was tired and drugged and he didn't mind using such as an excuse. Maybe he could make Light scream, use this experience as another means to blackmail Light.
But, truthfully, that's not what he wanted from this experience. He wanted someone he could trust, someone he could fall asleep on without having to spend the energy to hate. With Watari gone, L was looking for that person in places he never would normally, reaching out to find respite in one of the criminals he had sworn to catch. L's sense of professionalism had crumbled the moment Watari left his side, and he felt empty without his work. He had no purpose here in Death City. The closest thing to his old life he had was Kira, was Light, and to Kira, to Light, he clung.
There was no doubt in L's mind about this. It was impossible for them to return to the way things were, L knew that, so why not shift the dynamic between them through their intentions instead of just circumstance's? L had the chance to turn away long before this, even before he ate his piece of cake.
L's lips moved to press against Light's softly, then firmly, to seal the deal with a kiss. And with the seal, those lips brought Light's answer, even before L parted in order to speak it out loud. "I know."